“Look up at me.”
Blyne raised her head, her eyelashes already wet with shame and impatience.Vey’s gaze swept over her reddened eyes and ear tips, and he narrowed his eyes slightly.
“As long as you’re with me, I need you to look at me. The only thing you need to pay attention to is me. Look down, look up, open your eyes, close your eyes, and only listen to me.”
Blyne swallowed in her throat.
“Understood?”
“Understood.”
“Okay. Now kneel in front of the mirror.”
Blyne stood up, her legs were numb from kneeling, and she staggered as she got up. She heard the person behind her chuckle softly. Her back stiffened, and she turned her head to face Vey an ambiguous gaze.
She suddenly felt that she had probably misunderstood.
——Vey meant for her to crawl over.
A qualified sub probably wouldn’t make this mistake, but she realized this, bearing Vey the oppressive gaze, stood up, walked to the mirror, and knelt down again,Vey didn’t correct it either. She raised her leg and walked over, and through the mirror with Blyne looked at each other. Her eyes were calm, with an ambiguous scrutiny,Blyne but became more and more uneasy and flustered.
She wanted to lower her head again, but Vey sensed her embarrassment, leaned against the mirror, and used the leather paddle to lift her chin, forbidding her from lowering her head: “What are you thinking? Tell me.”
“I…”Blyne was forced to look at herself in the mirror. Just one glance and she avoided it as if electrocuted, her voice like a mosquito, “I did something wrong.”
“Where did you go wrong?”
She neither affirmed nor denied, but just asked back.
“I shouldn’t have walked over, I should…”
Blyne’s face blushed to her ear tips, and the hand on her thigh wrinkled her bathrobe. Answering these few words had already exhausted all her courage. Today, she had broken through herself again and again, but it was still very difficult to take the initiative to say the remaining few words.Vey was very patient, and waited for her to continue, the second hand ticking, and the air was like injected glue.
It has probably been a long time, and those few words still linger on the tip of her tongue,Vey moved her leg, perhaps a bit impatient,Blyne gently bit her tongue, closed her eyes, and said: “…I should crawl over.”
Something was collapsing,Blyne lowered her head even further, her shoulders trembling slightly. She thought that sometimes breaking the bottom line could be so simple, just a matter of words, yet this was so difficult. For some people, giving up is far harder than trying.
Vey remained unfazed, her tone devoid of emotion: “What are you always looking down for? Does this make you feel embarrassed?”
“……”
Embarrassed? Of course. At the moment her thoughts were exposed, she didn’t even dare to open her eyes, but what prevented her from looking up was not embarrassment, but something else.
She was already embarrassed enough, both just now and in the past. Was there anything she couldn’t let go of? If so, what was there that couldn’t be said?
Moreover, she and Vey were merely strangers, and after today, they may never see each other again.
Vey tapped her face with the paddle in a warning manner: “Have you forgotten something?”
Her hands tightened on her thighs,Blyne remembered to reply: “No.”
“If it’s not, then why not lift your head?”Vey didn’t punish her, just lightly patted her shoulder, softly instructing, “Look up.”
Before Blyne could move, she bent down and gently placed her hands on Blyne’s shoulders.
“Whether this is shame or pleasure actually depends on how you view it—aren’t you really not resisting at all? So why are you afraid to look up? Is it that admitting you can be vulnerable and submissive sometimes is too hard? But it’s just the two of us here, and after this, you’ll still be Blyne。”
“You can say the safe word.”
She indeed sprayed perfume, lighter than the scent of the shower gel, a cool fragrance on her pants, yet so warm when close, like a comfort and reward, almost like a silent seduction, whispering in her ear: has such a simple command reached the level of needing a safe word?
“Or you can look up now.”
Clearly not using any strength nor other movements, but Blyne was enveloped by her breath, and obeying the command became an instinctive response, lifting her head to see herself in the mirror.
She saw the glistening water in her eyes, her shoulders, collarbone, and chest were all red, and her chin, lightly poked by the paddle, flushed an even more ambiguous red. The sense of shame was like a vortex, pulling her towards an unknown place,Vey was always watching her, never taking her eyes off her.
The two looked at each other in the mirror. In just a few seconds, her vision was already blurred.Vey closed her eyes almost imperceptibly, a little annoyed, threw away the paddle, squatted down, and embraced her.
“Good girl, you did very well.” She gently patted Blyne’s shoulder and said softly, “That’s all for today, it’s over.”
Perhaps it was the warmth of the embrace, or perhaps the gentleness of her saying “good girl”,Blyne felt all her grievances surge up in an instant, her shoulders trembling and heaving. The more she tried to restrain herself, the less she could. Slowly, her vision blurred again.
The person in her arms was crying,Vey sat on the ground, gently embracing her.Blyne knew that crying like this was inappropriate, but the grievances accumulated over the past few days seemed to have found a breakthrough. Once the tears flowed, it was like a floodgate had been opened. She gave up, clenching Vey’s waist, burying her face in the crook of her neck.
From muffled sobs to restrained cries, to crying out loud as if no one was around, the person holding her didn’t say a word, quietly waiting for her to vent. Crying is actually a very tiring thing, as if turning the heart into a wet sponge trying to wring out its own water. Uncontrollable memories are like the hand clenching the sponge. Crying until her eyes turned black, her ears buzzing, a sob escaping from her throat, but no more tears could flow, as if she had cried them all dry.
“I’m sorry, I, I…”Blyne fumbled to wipe her face. Embarrassed, she wanted to apologize for crying and wetting Vey’s shirt.Vey smiled and shook her head, stopping her apology, and asked, “Do you want to take a shower?”
Blyne was still uncontrollably trembling, and she gently nodded.
“Then take a bath for a while, and then we’ll go to eat.”Vey wiped away the tears from the corners of her eyes with her thumb, “I’ll help you run the hot water.”
She stood up, and her body temperature was instantly gone,Blyne felt a void in her heart, instinctively chasing after her. She didn’t have time to get up, and only grabbed her trouser leg.
“Vey……！”
Vey paused, turned around, and her gaze moved up from her hand, over her red chest under the bathrobe, and then to her upturned, tear-stained face.
She narrowed her eyes slightly, and her expression changed. But Blyne didn’t have the mind to look closely. She only grabbed it and immediately let go, feeling very embarrassed. She wanted to lower her head, but still looked up at Vey’s face.
“Thank you.”
Vey slowly raised a smile: “You’re welcome.”
……
An hour later,Blyne got dressed and went downstairs to eat with Vey.
Putting on clothes,Vey seemed like a different person. She was still the slightly trendy, sunny, and cheerful college girl from when they first met, but she was driving a silver-gray Maserati… that wasn’t very girly.Blyne wondered if she had arranged to meet some important figure, and she was still trembling when she sat in the passenger seat.
“Do you have any dietary restrictions?”
Vey didn’t directly ask her what she wanted to eat—in fact, even if she asked,Blyne would only answer “whatever”, probably because she anticipated this answer, so Vey simply didn’t give her a choice.
She was very assertive and decisive. This point Blyne had already personally experienced in the hotel.
“No.”Blyne shook her head, and under the other person’s quiet gaze, she could only think hard and added, “But I don’t want to eat spicy food right now.”
“Okay, I got it.”
Vey thought for a moment and started the car.
“Fifteen-minute drive, you can connect Bluetooth if you want to listen to music.”
“It’s okay, I don’t need to.”
Blyne had swollen eyes, and her head also hurt a little, gently pressing her temples. Noticing her discomfort,Vey closed the car window and took out a bottle of electrolyte water from the side.
“Drink a little, you’ll feel better.”Vey handed her the water, gesturing to the intact cap, “It hasn’t been opened, it’s for you.”
Blyne thanked her softly, took it in her hand, but didn’t drink. She stared at Vey’s ring on her right middle finger. It was a rather understated design, a silver band with a black gemstone in the middle, which made her fingers look very white.
Vey, she should be single, right?Blyne realized she had only just thought of this question. She glanced nervously at the person in the driver’s seat out of the corner of her eye,Vey obviously noticed, and gave her an inquiring hum.
“Um,”Blyne tried to probe, “Does the ring have any meaning?”
“The ring?”Vey glanced at her own middle finger, “Oh, you mean this.”
Blyne tried hard to recall: “I remember a ring on the right middle finger is…”
attracting wealth, improving interpersonal relationships, or symbolizing that she was single? She couldn’t quite remember. But she thought Vey shouldn’t need to attract wealth; someone who drives this kind of car at the age of twenty-two generally doesn’t need to attract wealth, right?
“Actually, it doesn’t have any meaning. I just thought it looked nice when I was out playing,”Vey opened her hand in front of her, and then turned it over to show her the other side, “It’s said to be from the medieval period, there’s only one, and I only found out after buying it that it only fit the middle finger.”
She looked a little annoyed. Indeed, she was still a young person in her early twenties, and her expressions were more lively, revealing a bit of a girl’s delicacy and cuteness.Blyne couldn’t help but smile: “Okay.”
“So, don’t worry, I’m single.”
Vey flirtatiously glanced at her with a smile,Blyne stiffened, lowered her head and said “um.”
Her thoughts were seen through by Vey.
“Want to take it off and have a look?”Vey asked.
Blyne She was unexpectedly stunned: “Me, can I?”
“Of course.”
Vey extended her right hand towards her,Blyne didn’t understand, thinking she wanted to shake hands or hold hands, and cluelessly placed her hand in her palm.
Vey was taken aback, first held her hand, and then looked over: “I meant, let you take it off and look at it yourself.”
Blyne realized it belatedly and blushed, awkwardly let go of her hand, took off her ring, and quickly lowered her head to mumble: “Then why did you hold my hand back.”
Vey chuckle.
Not long ago, they were still in front of the hotel mirror, one standing and one kneeling, but now they were sitting properly in the car, studying a strange-looking ring together.
The third day of the month after next is Livia…which is her ex-girlfriend’s birthday. Just half a month ago, she was still planning to give a ring. They had been together for three years and experienced too many anniversaries,Blyne thought they had already given all the gifts in the world, except for a ring.
A small ring, an ordinary piece of jewelry, was given such a precious meaning of a promise. The black gemstone emitted a shimmering glow under the light,Blyne’s gaze became increasingly dim. When she broke up with her family and relied on thinking about how to make that promise to find solace in her suffering to survive,Livia what was she thinking? At that time, she and that girl had been together for nearly a year.
She would always be in a trance when recalling these things, and when she came to her senses, she realized she was putting the ring on her ring finger—and Vey was watching her.
“I’m sorry!”Blyne sat up straight with a “whoosh”, took off the ring, “I, I didn’t mean it, I just…”
…She just couldn’t finish for a long time. How should she explain it, saying that she Vey was sitting next to her, but her mind was always on her ex-girlfriend and the ring she didn’t give, and now she wanted to imagine what the ring would look like on her hand in this easily misunderstood way?
“It’s okay.” Luckily,Vey didn’t seem to care much, looked forward, and casually turned the steering wheel, “You just spaced out, didn’t you.”
The words were light and airy, without any hint of emotion, but Blyne’s back turned cold, and she felt inexplicably that Vey was displeased.
“Well, I was thinking about some things.”
She clearly didn’t want to elaborate,Vey wisely didn’t press, reaching out to her again,Blyne understood, and helped her put the ring back on. She hesitated, finally saying nothing, just curling her lip with a hint of helplessness.
They arrived at a private restaurant. The head chef was a girl, and Vey seemed very familiar with her. After a greeting,Vey led Blyne into a room upstairs. She didn’t know if it was Blyne’s illusion, but she felt the owner’s gaze Vey was meaningful as she entered with a girl whose eyes were swollen from crying.
Blyne didn’t want to delve further and followed Vey upstairs. The stairs were a bit steep,Vey was behind her, gently putting an arm around her waist to support her without excessive physical intimacy.
She didn’t know if all doms were like Vey this considerate. From opening the door to the entire meal, for Blyne the only thing she needed to do was follow and sit.Vey would help open doors, pull out chairs, pour water, and order dishes. She was very casual and at ease in her actions, with a kind of composed and considerate manner that seemed incongruous with her age.
Blyne was being taken care of so considerately for the first time. Back then,Livia never did this when pursuing her, so she was almost at a loss. Actually, she was more used to being the one at the table, watching others and serving tea, but she thought Vey probably didn’t want her to compete with her, so she accepted it with a bit of unease.
“This is my friend’s shop, no one will disturb us, don’t worry.”
With this opening, it was probably time to start discussing topics that were not convenient to talk about in front of others,Blyne involuntarily sat up a little straighter.
Vey She took a sip of water and asked, “How did you feel just now?”
Blyne quickly replayed it in her mind, cleared her throat, and forced composure: “It’s okay.”
Actually, it wasn’t just that it was possible. She hadn’t even taken off her clothes, but the feeling was more subtle than making love, not just because pain could also turn into pleasure. Kneeling in front of Vey presence, she seemed to be able to forget something temporarily. It was the most relaxed day she’d had in a month.
Or, it might just be that she had a good cry at the end, just a pure cry of joy.
Recalling these things,Blyne started to feel embarrassed again: “Did your previous subs also lose control of their emotions at the end?”
“Of course. There were those who got angry and wouldn’t let me touch them after it was over, those who were fine during the process but suddenly burst into tears when it was time to separate, and those who promised to only practice and not do anything but threw themselves at me on the bed after it was over… There were all kinds.”
“Ah?”
“That’s still good, at least I can handle it.”
“Ah?!”
Such a niche scene.
Vey smiled and comforted her: “It’s not just subs, doms sometimes need aftercare too. It’s normal to feel a sense of loss, don’t think too much about it.”
“Okay…”Blyne still had doubts, but she still believed her words, “So you just… uh, discipline me, hit me, can you also get pleasure from that?”
She still couldn’t say those two words without blushing or her heart racing.
Vey lifted her eyelids and glanced at her.
“Of course. Sex is a means, not an end. There’s more than one way for people to experience pleasure.”
“Watching you endure pain while enjoying it, suffering because of me while unconsciously relying on me and trusting me, that’s how I can feel pleasure.”
She didn’t seem to be lying, because Blyne saw her squint her eyes slightly, and there was a moment of satisfaction in her eyes, as if savoring something.
For some reason,Blyne back went numb. She remembered Vey leaning on the mirror and using the paddle to lift her chin, the expression on her face. Soon this strange numbness was replaced by a heat,Blyne took a sip of cold water.
Vey had taken in all her small movements, a hint of a smile in her eyes. Just then, the waiter knocked on the door to serve the dishes, she said “Come in” in a loud voice, and then to Blyne smiled: “Let’s eat first.”
She was quite comfortable, but Blyne was becoming more and more restless, and after the meal Vey even when asked if she liked the dishes, she couldn’t even say anything meaningful.Vey picked up her coat and her bag,Blyne couldn’t help but glance at her bag. The bag hadn’t been opened tonight… except for that one time in the hotel; she really couldn’t help but wonder what was inside.
“Did you bring, ahem, bring other props?”
Vey was a little surprised and admitted frankly: “Of course. There are ropes, rulers, whips…” Observing Blyne reddening face, she laughed and swallowed the words that would make people blush more easily, “Thinking that if you struggle and resist, I will tie you up and whip you.”
Blyne choked, and caught sight of her holding back a smile, only then did she realize she’d been fooled. She instantly deflated: “Vey, please don’t scare me, okay?”
“I’m not scaring you. Aren’t these very basic items? You found me, didn’t you think about it?”
Blyne turned her head and coughed, pretending not to hear.
“Shall I take you home?”Vey asked.
Blyne home was far from here. She couldn’t afford a place in the city center back then, so it wouldn’t be on the way for them. So she waved her hand and refused: “Don’t bother. It’s not far from the subway station, I’ll just take a walk.”
“Okay,”Vey nodded, “I’ll take you to the subway station.”
“Really, no need, thank you.”
Vey had been refused many times today, and she was already a little dissatisfied. She frowned, wanting to tell Blyne that she could actually exercise her right to be taken care of appropriately. But Blyne with her eyelashes slightly lowered in front of her—she had a very well-behaved face and knew when to be good most of the time, but now there was a faint redness still lingering at the corners of her eyes, and as she lowered her head and pondered some sad things that she didn’t want to tell others, her eyes and eyebrows were all subtly stubborn, and there was also an untimely thoughtfulness.
Vey suddenly felt a little annoyed, and she compromised: “Okay, then be careful.”
Blyne breathed a sigh of relief and nodded: “Thank you, bye.”
“Mmh, bye.”
She walked a few steps, then came back as if she had thought of something: “Um, how much did the room and meal cost? We’ll split it, remember to send it to me.”
Vey：“……”
Vey just stared at her like that, without saying a word,Blyne felt a little uneasy, not quite understanding why she had thought Vey was too young and lacked presence when they first met.
Actually, she also had things she wanted to say to Vey.For example, she wanted to know how she had performed today, wanted to once again Vey thank her, wanted to apologize to her, and also wanted to ask… if there would be a chance to meet again in the future.
She opened her mouth, before she could sort out her thoughts,Vey spoke first.
“No need to split the bill, it won’t cost much. You’ve been rejecting me all night, which actually makes me a little unhappy—but I can understand.”
“You should have noticed, I’m very controlling, and I have a bit of a dark sense of humor. But I can guarantee one thing: everything we do will only be based on your willingness and consent, and as long as you say the safe word, I will stop. I mean it.”
Vey reached out and smoothed the turned-up corner of her collar. This was their most intimate physical contact of the night,Blyne felt her heart race, and could smell the faint scent of perfume from her sleeve.
“If you’ve made up your mind, remember to contact me.”
“See you next time.”
End of Chapter